Childhood Verbal Abuse Is Just as Damaging as Physical or Sexual Abuse
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Did you or a close friend have a parent who frequently yelled or used threatening language when you were a child? For people who experience it, even from nonparental caregivers or teachers, the fallout of childhood verbal abuse may continue into adulthood, and is associated with an increased risk of anger, depression, substance abuse, self-harm, and obesity.
Because of the immediate and long-term impacts, verbal abuse needs to be viewed and studied as a stand-alone form of childhood maltreatment, according to a systematic review published in the October 2023 edition of Child Abuse & Neglect: The International Journal. This change could ensure targeted prevention and address the lasting harm that words can inflict, the authors wrote.
“Looking across studies, it is clear that childhood verbal abuse by adults has an immediate impact, leaving children feeling unloved, abandoned, and humiliated, which extends across the life span, leading to depression, anxiety, and suicidality,” says the lead author of the study, Shanta Dube, PhD, a researcher and the director of the master of public health program at Wingate University in North Carolina. This “hidden problem” can lead to a host of problems in adulthood and needs to be on the radar of detection, she adds.
The study stresses the need for attention to verbal abuse, because the consequences are just as significant as those of physical or sexual abuse, says Hilit Kletter, PhD, a psychiatrist at Stanford Medicine Children’s Health and the head of the Stanford Stress and Resilience Clinic in California. “It’s not really recognized to be as serious as some other forms of maltreatment — these findings add strong support to why that needs to change,” she says.
Parents Are Responsible for Most Childhood Verbal Abuse
Researchers analyzed a total of 149 quantitative and 17 qualitative studies to assess how child verbal abuse is currently defined and measured. The review found that the main perpetrators of childhood verbal abuse by adults were parents (76.5 percent), other adult caregivers in the home (2.4 percent), and teachers (12.71 percent). Coaches and police were also noted, each accounting for .6 percent.
Although verbal abuse may often be minimized — either by the perpetrator, the victim, or both — the damage it can cause is significant, says Dr. Kletter. “The impacts of childhood verbal abuse are seen in children and adolescents, and if left untreated, it can go well into adulthood and it impacts both mental and physical health. Both in research and in my own experience, it can result in a whole host of different conditions, including post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, increased risk of substance abuse, and suicidal ideation — so it does have very significant consequences,” she says.
In Dr. Dube’s recent work with substance use recovery centers, she hears from counselors how childhood verbal abuse is a prevalent issue among recovering individuals. “It can manifest as mental distress, substance use disorders, and problems with how we relate to others — and we must provide support, care, and empathy for those who still struggle,” she says.
Shouting and Screaming Are the Most Documented Type of Childhood Verbal Abuse
There was also a range of varying terminology associated with “verbal abuse” across the studies, with terms such as “verbal aggression,” “verbal hostility,” and “verbal abuse” being used — highlighting the need for standardized terminology in this area.
Shouting and screaming were the most commonly documented type of verbal abuse. But volume shouldn’t be the only consideration in what constitutes verbal abuse, wrote the authors. Intent, delivery, and the immediate effect on children are also factors.
Verbal Abuse Is Currently Classified as ‘Emotional Abuse’
Child maltreatment is classified into four subtypes: physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, and neglect, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).
The classifications are the basis for understanding the prevalence of the abuse, as well as interventions and the monitoring of affected populations. Currently, threats and other types of verbal abuse are put under the umbrella of emotional abuse, which is a part of the problem, according to the authors. But for childhood verbal abuse to be recognized, measured, studied, and prevented, a standardized definition and one that’s separate from other types of abuse is critical, say researchers.
Definitions often included behaviors detrimental to a child’s well-being, such as belittling, shouting, and threatening language, but the definitions varied from study to study. That lack of consistency is a problem, say the authors and Kletter.
For example, let’s say a researcher is doing an analysis of sexual abuse, and one study defines sexual abuse as any form of unwanted touching, and another study defines it as penetration only, says Kletter. Both studies are using the same term, but in different ways, and this can make a big difference in recognizing or measuring the effect of the abuse, she says.
Verbal Abuse Is Considered Okay in Some Cultures
Verbal abuse often goes unrecognized, in part because it’s complicated, says Kletter. “There are cultural factors that go into it. In some cultures it’s considered acceptable. It’s like, ‘This is how I was disciplined, and so this is how I choose to discipline my children.’”
Experts Aim to Reduce Verbal Abuse by Focusing on the Adult’s Actions
The researchers made a case for the term “childhood verbal abuse” rather than “emotional abuse,” a term they argue is ambiguous and focused on the victim’s response. By using the term “childhood verbal abuse,” the focus is on the adult’s actions; this distinction could be a starting point for prevention, were it to be made a subtype in its own right, they wrote.
Tremendous strides have been made in increased awareness and interventions targeting physical and sexual abuse perpetrators, leading to the reduction in these forms of maltreatment, says Dube. “If we focus on ‘verbal abuse’ by perpetrators rather than just ‘emotional abuse’ among victims, we may develop similar actions to prevent childhood verbal abuse and its consequences. Breaking the intergenerational cycles starts with the adults.”
The study was funded by the charity Words Matter, an organization focused on improving children’s mental and physical health and development by ending the verbal abuse of children by adults around them.
What to Do if You Still Feel the Impact of Childhood Verbal Abuse
If someone recognizes that they experienced childhood verbal abuse and realizes it is continuing to have negative effects, the recommended treatment is psychotherapy, says Kletter.
“While there are significant consequences to this type of abuse, I want to emphasize that it’s also very treatable. If you are suffering from the impact, do seek help, because we do have very effective interventions, and it can make a very big difference in someone’s life,” she says.
The most evidence-based type of psychotherapy for people who have experienced childhood verbal abuse is cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), says Kletter.
This approach to treating trauma and PTSD related to childhood trauma can help people change their thoughts and beliefs about the trauma to help them recover from the experience, according to the American Psychological Association.
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